The style guide for A Fistful of Soundtracks: The Blog

(Photo source: BACKYard Woods Explorer)

• Titles of songs, album tracks, short stories, TV series episodes, DVD or Blu-ray featurettes and cable channel or radio station programming blocks are always contained within quotation marks. Example from July 29, 2011: The "Rome, Italian Style" block on A Fistful of Soundtracks airs Mondays through Thursdays from 11am to noon. (However, even though Adult Swim is still technically a Cartoon Network programming block, the name isn't contained within quotes because Adult Swim evolved from a single-night block to a larger entity that Nielsen officially recognized as distinct from Cartoon Network in 2005, much like what happened to Nickelodeon's Nick at Nite.)

• Occupations or descriptive adjectives and nouns that appear before people's names are never capitalized. Example: constant self-recycler James Horner.

• Terms like "Filipino American," "Asian American" or "African American," which some writers prefer to hyphenate, are not hyphenated.

• The interpunct that used to be part of the Frito-Lay product name "Chee·tos" is absent whenever Cheetos is mentioned because of Frito-Lay's current official spelling, which removed the interpunct. Example: Why the hell does John Malkovich look like a human Cheeto during Transformers: Dark of the Moon?

• Numbers from one to nine are spelled out. Numbers above nine are written as figures (10, 11, 12, etc.) but are spelled out whenever they're the first words in sentences.

• The movie title Se7en and the procedural title Numb3rs maintain their unique spelling even though it looks stup1d.

• If a person is a Jr. or Sr., there is no comma between the name and Jr. or Sr. Example from January 13, 2009: Downey Jr. never drops character until the commentary is over.

• An ellipsis indicates a hammy pause. Example: "Dammit, Bones... this girdle you gave me for... my birthday... is too... constricting."

• Titles of movies, TV series, radio programs, podcasts, books, comic book series, magazines and newspapers are always italicized.

• Cardassians are whores for fascism. Kardashians are whores for attention.

(Photo source: Overthinking It)

• Names of online magazines like Salon and Slate are italicized. Names of blogs like DISGRASIAN, Burnt Lumpia and MovieMorlocks are not italicized.

• A Corolla is a car I damaged while driving it when I was a teen. A Carolla is a racist douchebag whose ass will get damaged by a gang of Pinoy teens if he ever sets foot in Daly City.

• Names of races and nationalities like African, Latino and Filipino are capitalized, but racial adjectives like "black," "white" and "brown" are not.

• "Sit for Baines" is a Back to the Future prequel fanfic about teenage George McFly's bumbling attempts to get to better know his crush Lorraine Baines by babysitting her younger brothers. "Shit for brains" is Fox News whenever it refers to Common as a gangsta rapper.

• Though this is an American blog and the word "license" is always spelled with just one "c," the British spelling of the 007 movie title Licence to Kill is left unchanged.

• "Michele Bachmann" is spelled with just one glassy "i."

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: The Dubliners, "The Rocky Road to Dublin"

Song: "The Rocky Road to Dublin" by The Dubliners
Released: 1964
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: Because of Warner Bros.' announcement from the other day that Robert Downey Jr.'s Sherlock Holmes sequel finally has a title (Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows), today's track from the "Rock Box" playlist is the Sherlock Holmes bare-knuckle boxing sequence music. It's the Irish folk band The Dubliners' 1964 recording of "The Rocky Road to Dublin," a 19th-century "slip jig" about an Irishman who travels from the town of Tuam to Liverpool to look for work and--here's a shocker--he gets in a fight, where his moves probably aren't as well-thought-out as the moves Sherlock comes up with to win the pitfight.

Coming Soon to a Theater in an Alternate Reality Near You

This was originally going to be a regular feature on my blog. Two April Fools Days ago, I posted some fake movie posters I made in Photoshop and was going to create some more, but I forgot that I suck at Photoshop, so Coming Soon to a Theater in an Alternate Reality Near You never became a regular thing.

Lately online, I've spotted some amusing posters for movies that don't exist, including a You Offend Me You Offend My Family poster of a whitewashed version of Better Luck Tomorrow, so I'm bringing back Coming Soon to a Theater in an Alternate Reality Near You to compile the cleverest or funniest examples of fake poster art.


I'd enjoy this John Boorman-directed Bruce Lee version of The Matrix way more than the actual Matrix. Poster by Sean Hartter.


Mister Miracle by Hartter.


Black Panther by Hartter.


Coming soon to a TV in an alternate reality near you: the Lost spinoff Reyes and Straume (also by Hartter).


From the Vulture blog's "Date Night–Inspired NBC Team-Ups We'd Like to See on the Big Screen" slideshow.


From a 2004 Television Without Pity Pixel Challenge.


From Fark.com's "movies that never existed but should have" forum.


From Cracked.com's "If Hollywood Decided to Give Everything a Gritty Reboot" contest.


Another Cracked gritty reboot: Edward Norton's Cheers.


Another fake Cheers movie poster, this time from Worth1000.com.

The next three are from Cracked's "Worst Possible Casting Decisions" contest.

Memorable quotes from commentary tracks #3

Jack Black: Look at my dick! Oh, it's gone. It's out of focus now.

Lincoln Osiris-voiced Robert Downey Jr.: Was you chubbin' up?

Black: [Laughs.] You know, Ben would lift weights, and I would chub up.

Osiris-voiced Downey: Baruchel comes into his own here too.

Black: Everyone has their own preparation.

Ben Stiller: Yeah, Jay's great in this scene.

Osiris-voiced Downey: Jay B. brings it.

Stiller: He's the grounding force.

Osiris-voiced Downey: Man, look at Brandon T. That's a beautiful man.

Stiller: Yeah, Brandon has great skin. Really, uh, just has a thing that just jumps off the screen.

Osiris-voiced Downey: Well, he's handsome.

Stiller: He is.

Osiris-voiced Downey: Man, look at him.

Stiller: The thing about... And Brandon did a great job in this scene...

Black: He does glisten.

Stiller: ... because this is a big reveal for his character.

Osiris-voiced Downey: You was all over him about the knittin' and how he need to make the knittin' look a certain way. You were fuckin' up in his head that day, man. I don't know how he made it, you toxic muthafucka.

--from the Tropic Thunder cast commentrak

About a Pinoy (Part 2)

Previously: Part 1.

Note: This is the second half of a bio I wrote about myself for my user profile at a Secret Identities: The Asian American Superhero Anthology creators' wiki on Wetpaint.com. I wrote this list a few weeks before I saw The Dark Knight, which would have wound up on the list had I seen the movie beforehand. Watchmen wouldn't have made the list though. I have mixed feelings about that film.(*)

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5 FAVORITE SCREEN ADAPTATIONS OF SUPERHERO COMICS


1. Batman: The Animated Series

Highlights: The revamped origins for Mr. Freeze and Two-Face, the early conflict between Batman and the police, the spectacular animation and Shirley Walker score during "Feat of Clay, Part 2," the Gray Ghost, "Harley and Ivy," Batman's hatred of It's a Wonderful Life, Kevin Conroy's performances in "Robin's Reckoning, Part 1," "Perchance to Dream" and "I Am the Night," the "death" of Batgirl, the Dark Knight Returns segment (and Joel Schumacher-bashing) in "Legends of the Dark Knight."

Worst moments: "I've Got Batman in My Basement," most of the episodes that were animated by AKOM (the worst of the many overseas studios that collaboed with Warner Bros. on B:TAS), Nightwing's mullet.

2. Batman Begins

Highlights: Wally Pfister's awesome cinematography, the realization during the Iceland-posing-as-Tibet sequences that this Batman wasn't going to be stagebound like the other films, Christian Bale's acting during the "party's over" speech, the excellent supporting cast, Jonathan Crane/Scarecrow's minimal dialogue, the lack of puns, "Do I look like a cop?!"

Worst moments: Why another love interest? Batman/Bruce has fuckbuddies, not soulmates. His one true love is his work.

3. Iron Man

Highlights: Robert Downey Jr.'s ad-libs, the Altman-esque dialogue, the performances by everyone in the cast, the character interplay, the evolution of the armor, Pepper saving Tony rather than the other way around, the final line before the closing credits.

Worst moments: Yinsen is essentially a rehash of the Magic Negro, despite a good performance by Shaun Toub.


4. Justice League Unlimited

Highlights: The Cadmus arc, the sight of Batman trying to buy a cup of joe inside a coffeehouse to stay awake, the Justice Lords, the jabs at Bill O'Reilly, Green Arrow's evolution from skeptical outsider to team booster/conscience, the guest shots by Joss Whedon alumni, the Question's secret love for teenybopper music, the Ultimen, the sight of Wonder Woman tucking the Atom into her cleavage, the Superman/Captain Marvel battle, the writers' clever way of getting Michael Rosenbaum to temporarily play his own character from Smallville.

Worst moments: The Batman Beyond retcon, the mostly forgettable pre-Unlimited first season, the wonky CGI in the opening titles during the pre-Unlimited seasons, the absence of a B:TAS-style full orchestra.

5. Spider-Man 2

Highlights: Ock's hospital massacre, the fact that Peter has a crappy apartment, the J. Jonah Jameson scenes, the "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" montage, the el train sequence, Tobey Maguire doesn't cry too much in this one.

Worst moments: The Ock character was better fleshed out in Michael Chabon's early draft before it was script-doctored.

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(*) During the sequence in which Dan Dreiberg gets a visit from the beans-craving Rorschach in his kitchen, the IMAX theater where I saw Watchmen experienced technical problems, and the projectionist had to stop running the film for about 15 minutes. The audience went apeshit, but they calmed down when the theater staff apologized and announced that they would offer re-admit passes to everyone at the end of the Watchmen screening. Luckily, the 15-minute interruption didn't ruin my enjoyment of the film.

Here are the things I love about Zack Snyder's adaptation of Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons' anti-superhero comic: the brilliant opening title sequence--the lesbian twist on the "V-J Day in Times Square" photo was the coolest and funniest part--and Jackie Earle Haley's fierce performance as the crazed Rorschach. I also think the film's modified climax works better than the rather screwy psychic squid master plan in the comic.


But the film has pacing problems--it feels rushed, resulting in a film that plays like a two-hour-and-40-minute theatrical cut of a 12-hour network TV miniseries. For instance, you don't get enough of a sense of the impact of Veidt's actions, which Gibbons hauntingly captured in the final chapter of the comic. (Will the extended cut that Snyder has planned for DVD and Blu-ray rectify the pacing problems?) I also don't like the wonky CGI for Veidt's genetically engineered lynx Bubastis and some of the hackneyed music choices, like "Ride of the Valkyries" during Dr. Manhattan's attack on the Vietcong. The lack of Elvis Costello on the film's soundtrack--the comic quoted Costello's "The Comedians"--kind of bums me out.

I like what AICN's Alexandra DuPont says about the Laurie Juspeczyk character. DuPont always thought of Laurie as "Karen Allen feisty--you could see how she was the sort of fiery woman who would attract powerful men despite her '80s-coke-queen exterior." Had Allen been a couple of decades younger, she would have been a better Laurie/Silk Spectre than Malin Akerman, who's too young to be playing a world-weary ex-"costumed adventurer." Also, I would have preferred Heroes' Jack Coleman as Dan/Nite Owl--he's the right age for Dan, plus Hollywood ought to hire Coleman, the best actor on Heroes, more often. But Patrick Wilson did a fine job and was more subtle than I expected as the washed-up, nerdy Dan.

God, I let this footnote go on too long. The end is nigh.

Five favorite DVD extras

On Tuesday, November 25, my special copy of the long-out-of-print Freaks and Geeks Yearbook Edition box set stopped being so special. That was the day Shout! Factory reissued the limited edition set--which was available only to fans like me who signed an online petition to get Freaks and Geeks released on DVD--and made the collectible available to everybody.

But I'm glad more viewers can now get the chance to enjoy the Yearbook Edition because hands down, it's the most impressive TV show box set ever put together. The packaging was designed to resemble a hardbound yearbook from Freaks and Geeks' 1980 high school setting, complete with an embossed McKinley High Norseman logo on the cover and pages of photos of the McKinley kids (actually behind-the-scenes snapshots of the cast) surrounded by the same corny typewritten text that's always found in yearbooks, plus ballpoint-pen scrawlings by the show's characters. In 2004, Freaks and Geeks creator Paul Feig recalled to Entertainment Weekly how the packaging designers reacted to his suggestions for the fake yearbook. He said, "The design guys were like, 'Everything you're trying to get us to do is stuff we spent years trying to stop doing.' It's like, 'I know, but it's gotta look kinda s---ty.'"

The Yearbook Edition is worth the extra ducats, thanks to Shout! Factory's willingness to pay expensive music-clearance fees so that each of the Freaks and Geeks music supervisors' '70s and '80s rock song picks remained in the show (that's one reason why the Freaks and Geeks DVDs cost so much), as well as the buttload of fascinating and sometimes strange bonus features (the standard edition contains less bonuses). My favorite extra gives us glimpses of an alternate-universe Freaks and Geeks. It's the audition footage of cast members as characters they didn't wind up playing on the show (Busy Philipps as Lindsay!).

The box set made me ponder which other DVD extras are equally enjoyable and which ones make viewers uncomfortable and are difficult to sit through, like some of the offbeat Freaks and Geeks commentary tracks that even the show's most die-hard fans will admit they find to be cringe-inducing and not worth their time (Portland film critic D.K. Holm said he was creeped out by the Freaks and Geeks stage parents' commentrak).

1. Robert Downey Jr. doing the Tropic Thunder actors' commentary in the accent of whatever character Kirk Lazarus is playing onscreen at the moment
In the movie, Kirk the insane and overcommitted Method actor says, "Man, I don't drop character 'til I done the DVD commentary." So Downey Jr. never drops character until the commentary is over. A commentrak in which the stars "get into character" is not a new concept, but Downey Jr. the comic genius takes it to another level.

2. "30 Rock Live!"
This 30 Rock: Season 2 extra is a home video of a 2007 UCB Theater appearance by the cast, who gave a staged reading of a script for an episode that hadn't aired yet at the time (one of my favorites, "Secrets and Lies," the ep in which Tracy wins a "Pacific Rim Emmy" and then gives Jenna a "sharking"). In an awesome gesture, the cast staged the UCB Theater show to raise money for the 30 Rock production assistants during the writers' strike. Though the footage quality isn't the best, this live version is a fun alternate take on "Secrets and Lies," and it even includes some amusing dialogue that was trimmed from the final cut. The highlights of the live performance are Alec Baldwin's sex faces during his love scenes with SNL staff writer Paula Pell, who subbed for absent "Secrets and Lies" guest star Edie Falco, and the improvised fake commercials with Jack McBrayer and Scott Adsit.

3. Jack Black pleading with the notoriously stingy surviving members of Led Zeppelin to license "Immigrant Song" for School of Rock (with the help of an audience full of a thousand screaming Zep fans)
Black says Richard Linklater came up with the idea to film the plea to Zep from the Staten Island theater where the movie's Battle of the Bands climax was shot. Linklater, you're a genius. (And yes, the filmed message ultimately won over Zep and they granted Linklater permission to use "Immigrant Song.")

4. The Peter Ustinov interview on the Spartacus Criterion Collection two-disc
Originally videotaped for the 1992 Criterion laserdisc, this special feature is easily the most entertaining laserdisc/DVD interview with a raconteur I've seen, thanks to Ustinov's gift for mimicry--he busted out dead-on impressions of his Spartacus co-stars Laurence Olivier and Charles Laughton--and his jabs at Laughton, "an extremely sensitive man who went through life just waiting to be offended."

5. The "Mayonnaise Thing" extra on the Comedians of Comedy DVD
Brian Posehn and Zach Galifianakis must have been baked out of their minds while goofing around with the cameras and shooting this uproarious fake gay porno video, which appears in a much shorter and less explicit form in the documentary. Grossness alert: Posehn takes off his shirt.

Extras that make viewers uncomfortable:
- Claudia Christian arguing with Tom Wilson and then storming off halfway through the Freaks and Geeks "Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers" commentrak
- Linda Doucett shedding tears during an awkward but reconcilatory reunion with her ex-boyfriend Garry Shandling on a Larry Sanders featurette
- Cybill Shepherd weeping during the Moonlighting commentraks
- The 2006 Repo Man reissue's strange 21-minute interview with a short-tempered, rambling Harry Dean Stanton (I'd love to see how Stanton and the equally weird James Lipton would react to each other if Stanton ever winds up on Inside the Actors Studio)
- The dizzyingly shot Being John Malkovich mockumentary about Spike Jonze that ends with him puking on the side of the road