Empire Records live-tweet recap (because today is Record Store Day)

(Photo source: Matt Ranzetta)

During the week Record Store Day 2010 took place, I live-tweeted Empire Records, which is set at a record store and seems to turn up on cable at least once every week. The movie is at its best when it pokes fun at washed-up soap stars/pop singers and sticks to being a relaxed comedy about working at a record store. At its worst, Empire Records is like a lousy and overdramatic Canadian teen soap that wouldn't look out of place on TeenNick.

Today is Record Store Day 2011, so I'm reposting my tweets about Empire Records.

(If you're not reading this on Record Store Day, this live-tweet recap can function as textual commentary that you can refer to while Empire Records is playing on TV. Sometimes, a certain movie I like will turn up on TV, and I want to see what someone else wrote about the movie, so I'll open an article or Wikipedia entry or IMDb trivia page about the movie that I had saved onto my laptop.)

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Frigging Rex Manning Day. In a few minutes, I'm live-tweeting the #EmpireRecords: Remix! Special Fan Edition DVD, which came out in 2003.
12:05 PM

I'm a few minutes late. I'm on SuperStation TBS time.
12:06 PM

The Warner logo means the #EmpireRecords: Remix! Special Fan Edition live-tweet starts now. Why live-tweet a DVD that dropped 7 years ago?
12:09 PM

#EmpireRecords has things in it I like (particularly some of the songs and the fake Rex Manning music) and things I can't stand.
12:10 PM

The things I can't stand during #EmpireRecords (or as I like to call the film, Car Wash for alt-rockers) make it worthy of a live-tweet.
12:10 PM

When I started writing the webcomic The Palace, which is set at an indie theater, I told myself I must avoid the cliches of #EmpireRecords.
12:11 PM

The movie is an example of fun premise/sloppy execution (all that shit happens to the staffers in one day?).
12:11 PM

The movie flings dramatic crises at you with all the precision of a chimp flinging his poop at zoo-goers.
12:11 PM

This is the kind of movie where dunking a teen's head in the sink will make her diet pill addiction magically disappear.
12:13 PM

The midnight customer lady says, "Ugh, I couldn't look at Letterman's face for another second." Must be a fucking Leno fan.
12:13 PM

"Ugh, I couldn't look at Letterman's face for another second." I bet she masturbates over Leno's freakish-looking chin.
12:14 PM

Though he's much funnier than Leno, Letterman's no prize either. 11:35 network TV show hosting is for ugly rich people.
12:15 PM

I like the soundtracks of Allan Moyle's movies more than the movies themselves.
12:15 PM

"A Girl Like You" from the #EmpireRecords CD was my theme tune for when I tried to spit game at some hot UCSC neighbor chick in 1995.
12:15 PM

I'm the Edwyn Collins of skirtchasing. I'm a one-hit wonder.
12:16 PM

Rory Cochrane's Zen troublemaker Lucas is one of the few movie characters who can pull off a Spock haircut.
12:16 PM

As the opening credits roll, I have no idea which scenes Warner Bros. added to the theatrical cut in 2003.
12:16 PM

I think one of the added scenes is Lucas weeping for V'Ger as he would for a brother.
12:18 PM

Hey, it's Carey Mulligan. Woops, nope, my bad. It's a young Ethan Embry.
12:19 PM

Ethan Embry from Showtime's Brotherhood (back when he was known as Ethan Randall) plays Shaggy, uh, I mean, Mark.
12:20 PM

Showtime's Brotherhood. I think I bought an EP release by that band once.
12:20 PM

Showtime's Brotherhood sounds like some band that once opened for Jane's Addiction or... K's Choice or... Eve's Plum.
12:21 PM

Hard to believe that Mark and the cop in Brotherhood were played by the same guy.
12:21 PM

Liv Tyler's car scene is shot to look exactly like her Aerosmith video with Alicia Silverstone, in case we forget who Liv is.
12:22 PM

I like how Anthony LaPaglia doesn't give a shit about A.J.'s problems. It's Jack Malone: The Record Store Years.
12:23 PM

Jack Malone was an undercover Fed who posed as Joe, a Delaware record store owner, before he transferred to Missing Persons.
12:23 PM

Agent Malone's assignment was to investigate why Delaware record store employees keep dancing and never seem to do any work.
12:23 PM

A.J. shouts, "A little bit of focus would make me very happy!" That's also what I said about the 2nd half of this movie.
12:24 PM

The narrative in #EmpireRecords is often interrupted by overlong footage of what Dave Chappelle would call "white people dancin'."
12:25 PM

The writer of #EmpireRecords based it on a Tower Records she used to work at. I don't remember seeing the Tower clerks dance all the time.
12:25 PM

Not even the clerks at laid-back Streetlight Records here in the Bay Area are this peppy or fond of air-guitaring.
12:26 PM

High Fidelity's Championship Vinyl is what a real indie record store looks like. #EmpireRecords is a record store straight outta Disneyland.
12:28 PM

Where's the clerk who laughs at customers' music choices?
12:29 PM

Where are the clerks who yak at length about how bitter they still are about Glenn Danzig not being cast as Wolverine?
12:29 PM

Although Tower was the basis for #EmpireRecords, it's portrayed as the enemy and renamed Music Town. The facade is red/yellow like Tower's.
12:30 PM

Tower is also a villain in Treme. Its pilot has a funny subplot in which Steve Zahn fights Tower to get his band's CDs back.
12:30 PM

Maxwell Caulfield's character Rex Manning is like a white--and straight--Ricky Martin. Hey, they even got the same initials.
12:31 PM

In #EmpireRecords' alternate universe, "Say No More" is like "Livin' La Vida Loca" in 1999. You can't hide your ears from the motherfucker!
12:31 PM

Liv Tyler resembles Unhappily Ever After-era Nikki Cox during the scene when she's dancing to "Say No More."
12:32 PM

All that's missing is the audience of drunken sailors who were bused in to the studio to holla at Nikki Cox.
12:32 PM

Anthony LaPaglia says to Ethan Embry, "Mark, could you please not sing?" Mark, could you please try not to be funny?
12:36 PM

Mark is the stoner version of the Martian comic relief from Santa Claus Conquers the Martians who tries too hard to be wacky.
12:36 PM

Cochrane is the funniest actor in the movie. "Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear."
12:38 PM

It's as if Cochrane came from a different, wittier movie. He's like the basketball coach who's too witty to be in Teen Wolf.
12:38 PM

Lucas doesn't get fired for gambling away $9000 of #EmpireRecords' money. Good thing Joe doesn't fire Lucas. He's the only funny character.
12:39 PM

Aw yeah, "Romeo & Juliet" by Dire Straits. Because this is #EmpireRecords, we're given only 30 seconds to savor the tune.
12:39 PM

The ballet dancer customer who's getting checked out by Mark during the Dire Straits sequence looks like Maria McKee.
12:39 PM

The Maria McKee/Lone Justice track "Ways to Be Wicked" is a great forgotten driving-with-the-top-down song from the '80s.
12:40 PM

Lone Justice is also known for "Shelter." Let me be your shelter, shelter from the annoying Mark, Maria McKee lookalike.
12:40 PM

Lone Justice's "Ways to Be Wicked" has nothing to do with #EmpireRecords, but it's a cool fucking song: http://bit.ly/KbZP3
12:40 PM

The ballet dancer is played by Maxwell Caulfield's stepdaughter from his marriage to Juliet Mills.
12:41 PM

I want the Devo hat lampshade that's behind Lucas when Joe tells him he should have come to him for help.
12:43 PM

Robin Tunney, who plays Deb, cuts off her hair to the tune of "Free" by the Martinis. The #EmpireRecords song list: http://bit.ly/cneIj2
12:45 PM

The Martinis was co-founded by TV composer Joey Santiago, the Pinoy member of the Pixies. "Free": http://bit.ly/DWE6O
12:45 PM

The Pixies get mentioned in closing credits dialogue between Eddie the pizzaboy and Mark about bands they dig and hate.
12:45 PM

One day, Britney Spears saw Robin Tunney shave off her hair, and a Cheetos-stained lightbulb popped up over her head.
12:45 PM

Too bad Deb didn't lower that electric shaver and work on her armpits as well.
12:46 PM

One of the lamest moments in #EmpireRecords is Liv Tyler's boring floppy-haired love interest referring to Mr. Miyagi as Chinese.
12:47 PM

Miyagi is Japanese, you emo dipshit who told the barber, "Dude, make me look like a greasy, post-Eight Is Enough Adam Rich."
12:47 PM

Because of his line about Miyagi, I got a kick out of seeing Johnny Whitworth get bitchslapped and killed in 3:10 to Yuma.
12:48 PM

There are some pretty awful Gen-X hairdos in this flick (exhibit A: A.J.). Speaking of Gen-Xers: http://onion.com/9tDHch
12:48 PM

That Simpsons episode that flashed back to Homer and Marge as Gen-Xers must have turned to this movie for fashion ideas.
12:49 PM

See, kids, the thing that the pizzaboy handed to Mark is called a cassette. No, you can't plug it in to your MacBook, silly.
12:49 PM

"Video Killed the Radio Star" was the first music video MTV played. I'm looking forward to "Internet Killed the Video Star."
12:53 PM

"Internet Killed the Video Star" will then be followed by "Holobands Killed the Internet Star."
12:54 PM

Is Rex Manning a jab at Richard Marx? The fans who show up for Rex Manning Day were probably also into Richard Marx.
12:57 PM

I have no clue who Justin Bieber is, other than he's a trending topic and he has a Rex Manning-like future ahead of him.
12:57 PM

I can't name any of Bieber's songs. Whenever he performed on SNL last week, I would change the channel to Austin City Limits.
12:58 PM

I flicked to Austin City Limits and pretended Kings of Leon was Tina's musical guest. That's how interested I am in Bieber.
12:58 PM

Shh! It's my favorite scene. Renee Zellweger dances around in nothing but a Music Town apron and black panties.
12:59 PM

Dave Chappelle's Trading Spouses character said, "Who the hell is Renee Zell-weh-jer?" That the hell is Renee Zell-weh-jer.
12:59 PM

Or rather WAS Renee Zell-weh-jer. She isn't aging as gracefully as Liv Tyler is.
12:59 PM

I would love to see some chick turn the Renee Zellweger Music Town apron into a Halloween costume someday.
1:00 PM

Great understated bit of comic acting by Cochrane as he reacts to Gina in the apron and covers Warren the shoplifter's eyes.
1:00 PM

"Hey Rex, what happened to your hair?" Hey Debi Mazar, what happened to your hair?
1:00 PM

With the red pixie cut, Debi Mazar looks like she's auditioning to be the white member of the Mary Jane Girls.
1:02 PM

Debi Mazar plays a record label publicist who secretly hates Rex. Her publicist character on Entourage is far less timid.
1:03 PM

I want to see Mazar's Entourage character get into a filthy insult duel with Peter Capaldi's spin doctor from In the Loop.
1:04 PM

The #EmpireRecords cast includes 3 future stars of CBS procedurals: Without a Trace's Anthony LaPaglia, The Mentalist's Robin Tunney and...
1:05 PM

... Rory Cochrane. He went on to briefly co-star with David Caruso's sunglasses on CSI: Miami.
1:05 PM

I'm not sure what the amount of future CBS procedural actors in the cast says about #EmpireRecords. Maybe they were looking for a corpse...
1:06 PM

... without realizing that the corpse was #EmpireRecords itself. The movie sat on Warner Bros.' shelf and then died at the box office.
1:06 PM

I know, Without a Trace was a missing persons show, not a whodunit like Mentalist & CSI, but for the purposes of that joke...
1:07 PM

Ethan Embry was also a regular on a procedural, but this one aired on ABC: Ed O'Neill's surprisingly not-so-crappy Dragnet.
1:08 PM

I liked the O'Neill Dragnet more than the Dragnet everyone else grew up on because unlike Jack Webb, O'Neill can act.
1:08 PM

I liked how nobody on Dick Wolf's Dragnet read their lines off cue cards like on the Jack Webb version.
1:09 PM

Having O'Neill partner up with his Dutch co-star Embry was a nice touch. So was Mike Post's update of the Dragnet theme.
1:15 PM

The quality of O'Neill's Dragnet didn't last though. It became unwatchable when it changed its title to L.A. Dragnet.
1:15 PM

L.A. Dragnet? WTF, Dick Wolf? That's like if one day, he decided to change Law & Order's title to N.Y. Law & Order...
1:16 PM

... or if CBS decided to change the title of its new Hawaii Five-0 remake to Hawaiian Hawaii Five-0.
1:16 PM

A.J. weirds out Corey with "I love you." Michael Showalter's lovesick Wet Hot American Summer character was a parody of A.J.
1:22 PM

Any scene between Johnny Whitworth's A.J. and Liv Tyler's Corey is always a good time for me to go clean out my e-mail.
1:22 PM

Caring about the romance in #EmpireRecords is like watching Caddyshack just to see if Michael O'Keefe will win over the chick from Ireland.
1:23 PM

#EmpireRecords director Allan Moyle also made Pump Up the Volume, which features an odd appearance by a Wonder Years babe-turned-porn star.
1:24 PM

The most interesting thing about Pump Up the Volume is that the pregnant teen was played by future Tiger Woods penis cozy Holly Sampson.
1:24 PM

My 2 favorite tracks from the #EmpireRecords album--"A Girl Like You" and the Cranberries' "Liar"--are back-to-back in the movie.
1:28 PM

Edwyn Collins shot two "A Girl Like You" videos. They Might Be Giants' John Flansburgh directed one of them: http://bit.ly/aZk7wV
1:29 PM

The full version of the great fake pop song "Say No More": http://bit.ly/wuh6Z. "Say No More" wasn't included on the #EmpireRecords album.
1:30 PM

Soundtrack albums that don't contain many of the songs I liked hearing in the movie are annoying (#EmpireRecords, GoodFellas).
1:32 PM

"Say No More" is a dead-on parody of washed-up soap actors-turned-pop singers, right down to Rex's puffy shirt.
1:32 PM

#EmpireRecords must've been temp-tracked with Beastie Boys joints. Rex Manning gets thrown out to the tune of a "Johnny Ryall" soundalike.
1:33 PM

#EmpireRecords is one caffeine pill away from turning into a very special Saved by the Bell.
1:34 PM

Aw Christ, the Renee Zellweger/Liv Tyler screaming match is more OTT than Elizabeth Berkley's "I'm So Excited" meltdown.
1:34 PM

If Liv Tyler performed her screaming match with Zellweger in Elvish, the Elvish still wouldn't save the scene from sucking.
1:35 PM

#EmpireRecords is an incredibly bipolar movie. Many of its characters act like it too.
1:35 PM

Amazon.com's #EmpireRecords review is spot-on: the film "screeches with the sound of teenagers falling apart emotionally every 5 minutes."
1:35 PM

From Google Health's page on bipolar disorder: "Periods of excitability (mania) alternating with periods of depression"?
1:36 PM

"The 'mood swings' between mania and depression can be very abrupt"? Yep, that describes #EmpireRecords to a tee.
1:36 PM

Perhaps bipolar isn't even the right word to describe #EmpireRecords' constant changes in tone. It's more like quintupolar.
1:38 PM

By the way, what the hell is up with that expression "describes it to a tee"? That expression makes no sense.
1:38 PM

Robin Tunney's delivery of "Oh Rexy, stop that! You're so sexy!" is amusing. Funniest bald chick since Shorty Robe Ilia.
1:39 PM

"You are the Kirk Unit." How does an actress say that with a straight face?
1:40 PM

The no-longer-bald stand-up comic Rene Hicks was a pretty funny bald lady too.
1:41 PM

Tracy Morgan does a dead-on Chewbacca. He also recently did a hilarious impression of Dr. Zaius on Letterman.
1:41 PM

I don't know if Tracy Morgan's ever seen Star Trek: The Motion Picture, but...
1:41 PM

... I'd like to see Tracy Morgan add the Ilia probe to his repertoire of '60s/'70s sci-fi character impressions.
1:43 PM

Mark wolfs down Eddie's pot brownies and laughs it up as he imagines himself jamming on TV with GWAR.
1:43 PM

Pot brownies can help make unfunny things funnier, like this GWAR/brownies sequence. Or According to Jim. Or Mind of Mencia.
1:44 PM

Or Glenn Beck comedy tours. On second thought, maybe not even pot brownies could help make them entertaining.
1:44 PM

Eddie the Henry Rollins-hating pizzaboy is one of the few #EmpireRecords characters who's not recycled from an '80s teen flick.
1:45 PM

Most of the #EmpireRecords characters don't discuss their musical tastes, so it's a relief to hear Eddie drop knowledge about Eric Clapton.
1:46 PM

Eddie, who's played by James "Kimo" Wills, actually sounds like someone I'd find working in an indie record store.
1:46 PM

There's a funny @The_AV_Club article about movie and TV characters with unconvincing musical tastes: http://bit.ly/aZi4KO
1:46 PM

One good thing about #EmpireRecords is that it doesn't have Eddie express some out-of-nowhere love for Hootie & the Blowfish or something.
1:46 PM

#EmpireRecords was originally written to take place over 2 days, but they got squished into one. No wonder this movie makes little sense.
1:47 PM

#EmpireRecords is like the chick in the Elvis Costello song "Episode of Blonde." It has the attention span of warm cellophane.
1:47 PM

As #EmpireRecords squeezes in dramatic crisis after dramatic crisis, I feel like Mel Brooks at the start of High Anxiety.
1:47 PM

Instead of "What a dramatic airport!," it's "What a dramatic independent record store!"
1:48 PM

An #EmpireRecords dramatic scene that's actually not terrible is Deb at her "funeral," quietly deciding not to try to kill herself anymore.
1:49 PM

The mock funeral is clearly a shout-out to Robert Altman's M*A*S*H.
1:51 PM

Speaking of Altman, Liv Tyler went on to give what's perhaps her best performance so far in Cookie's Fortune.
1:52 PM

The fake funeral in the middle of the day makes no sense. I thought Rex Manning Day's supposed to the busiest day of the yr.
1:52 PM

Despite making no sense, Deb's fake funeral is genuinely amusing. Deb gets annoyed by how self-absorbed her "mourners" are.
1:53 PM

Tyra from Friday Night Lights has a lot in common with Gina. Both are trampy blondes who don't want to turn into their moms.
1:54 PM

WARNING: Warren the shoplifter's Johnny Rotten-like screechy voice may frighten canine viewers.
1:55 PM

On the couch, Renee Zellweger is sitting on Liv Tyler's lap. Is this heading towards a lingerie pillow fight? I hope so.
1:56 PM

This movie would be shorter if the townspeople used Twitter to spread the word about the store-saving midnight concert.
2:02 PM

#EmpireRecords was my 1st exposure to Renee Zellweger. When Jerry Maguire dropped, I was like, "It's the apron chick from #EmpireRecords."
2:03 PM

I've actually never seen Jerry Maguire, even though I bought a widescreen VHS of Jerry Maguire 11 years ago.
2:04 PM

VHS was where #EmpireRecords found its cult after a theatrical run that shouldn't even be called a release. It was more like a silent fart.
2:06 PM

Hal Sparks-ish Evil Corporate Exec from Music Town says one of the movie's best lines: "Doesn't anybody work in this store?"
2:06 PM

Zellweger's performance of "Sugar High" on the rooftop is another highlight of #EmpireRecords. No lip-synching-to-Marni Nixon shit here.
2:07 PM

Coyote Shivers is best known for "Sugar High" and getting slapped with restraining orders by his ex--Abby from NCIS.
2:07 PM

Coyote Shivers' douchey treatment of Pauley Perrette is diminishing my enjoyment of "Sugar High."
2:08 PM

Abusing and stalking Abby from NCIS is like clubbing a baby seal. A Gothy, studded dog collar-wearing baby seal.
2:08 PM

Wow. @smush21 of @GraceNMichelle recreates Renee Zellweger's outfit and sings "Sugar High": http://bit.ly/9utUo0
2:09 PM

Tobey Maguire, who's listed in the credits but was deleted from #EmpireRecords' theatrical cut, isn't found in this 2003 "Remix" either.
2:13 PM

This 2003 version of #EmpireRecords is 17 minutes longer than the 1995 version, yet they weren't able to squeeze in Spider-Man?
2:13 PM

Maybe Maguire had a crying scene that's as awful as his Spider-Man 3 crying scenes. Maybe that's why he remains deleted from #EmpireRecords.
2:14 PM

The Tobey Maguire footage that we all want to see isn't even included in the DVD's deleted scenes.
2:14 PM

The deleted scenes contain more of Maxwell Caulfield as Rex and establish that he once was like the Coyote Shivers character.
2:14 PM

In the deleted footage, Rex redeems himself and gets his street cred back by jamming with Coyote Shivers.
2:15 PM

I'll now describe Rex's regained street cred in rap history terms without sounding like a dumbass like Michael Steele.
2:15 PM

Rex is LL Cool J, and his deleted midnight concert scene is his Mama Said Knock You Out moment after losing his street cred.
2:16 PM

The Gin Blossoms' "Til I Hear It from You" was co-written by Marshall Crenshaw? I did not know that. That's weird wild stuff.
2:16 PM

For some reason, I thought Adam Schlesinger from Fountains of Wayne co-wrote "Til I Hear It from You."
2:17 PM

"Til I Hear It from You" is a pop song I'm kind of ashamed to admit I like.
2:17 PM

My text commentary continues for a few minutes after the credits ended. I guess this is like the Fast Times DVD commentrak.
2:18 PM

It looks like #EmpireRecords director Allan Moyle was trying to make a freewheeling Altman flick for Gen-Xers...
2:19 PM

... but the different sections (ooh, it's an Afterschool Special about drugs... ooh, now it's on suicide) don't gel together.
2:19 PM

There's a much better Altman-esque flick for Gen-Xers that also starred Rory Cochrane. It's called Dazed and Confused.
2:20 PM

Even though Dazed and Confused is set in the '70s, it's very much a Gen-Xer film.
2:20 PM

The dramatic conflicts in Dazed and Confused feel much less forced. I almost forgot that Renee Zellweger is also in D&C.
2:21 PM

As a shout-out to Cochrane and Zellweger's earlier film, a store register had a Dazed and Confused bumper sticker on it.
2:22 PM

The register with the Dazed and Confused sticker was behind Warren the shoplifter while he waved his gun around.
2:22 PM

Rent Dazed and Confused instead of #EmpireRecords if you haven't seen either film. The drinking games you can play during D&C are the shit.
2:23 PM

After the "Drink when Wiley Wiggins touches his nose" game during Dazed and Confused, you'll be dead from alcohol poisoning.
2:25 PM

End of #EmpireRecords live-tweet. Damn the man. Drop by afistfulofsoundtracks.blogspot.com for the live-tweet recap.
2:26 PM

(Empire Records photo sources: Fanpop, SEMI)

"Rock Box" Track of the Day archive

January 3, 2011: The Crystal Method, "Starting Over"
January 4, 2011: Run-DMC, "Rock Box"
January 5, 2011: Pulp, "Like a Friend"
January 6, 2011: Classic & 86, "Ridin'"
January 7, 2011: The Roots feat. Malik B. & Dice Raw, "Here I Come"
January 10, 2011: Puccio Roelens, "Caravan"
January 11, 2011: The Who, "I'm One"
January 12, 2011: Madvillain feat. M.E.D. a.k.a. Medaphoar, "Raid"
January 13, 2011: Stevie Wonder, "I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever)"
January 14, 2011: Elton John, "Amoreena"
January 17, 2011: Edo G feat. Masta Ace, "Wishing"
January 18, 2011: The Motherhood, "Soul Town"
January 19, 2011: Tom Jones, "Sex Bomb (Peppermint Disco Mix)"
January 20, 2011: Matt & Kim, "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare"
January 21, 2011: The Jimi Hendrix Experience, "Crosstown Traffic"
January 24, 2011: A Flock of Seagulls, "Space Age Love Song"
January 25, 2011: Brother Noland, "Coconut Girl"
January 26, 2011: Spandau Ballet, "Gold"
January 27, 2011: Aloe Blacc, "I Need a Dollar"
January 28: 2011: Harry Nilsson, "Jump Into the Fire"
January 31, 2011: The Blind Boys of Alabama, "Way Down in the Hole"
February 1, 2011: Vampire Weekend, "A-Punk"
February 2, 2011: Beastie Boys, "Shambala"
February 3, 2011: Cameo, "Candy"
February 4, 2011: Tony Lucca, "Devil Town"
February 7, 2011: Earth, Wind & Fire, "Reasons"
February 8, 2011: Dinah Washington, "This Bitter Earth"
February 9, 2011: Raekwon feat. Inspectah Deck, Ghostface Killah and GZA, "Guillotine (Swordz)"
February 10, 2011: Iggy and the Stooges, "Search and Destroy"
February 11, 2011: Neil Richardson, "The Riviera Affair"
February 14, 2011: The Jackson 5, "Never Can Say Goodbye"
February 15, 2011: The Skyflakes, "Talk About Today"
February 16, 2011: Pixies, "Where Is My Mind?"
February 17, 2011: The Dubliners, "The Rocky Road to Dublin"
February 18, 2011: Roxy Music, "Same Old Scene"
February 21, 2011: The Bar-Kays, "Too Hot to Stop"
February 22, 2011: Geto Boys, "Still"
February 23, 2011: Death from Above 1979, "Romantic Rights"
February 24, 2011: The Heavy, "Short Change Hero"
February 25, 2011: The Pogues, "The Body of an American"

The "Rock Box" block on A Fistful of Soundtracks airs 4-6am, 9-11am and 3-5pm on Mondays and 5-7am, 9-11am and 3-5pm on Fridays.

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Geto Boys, "Still"

Song: "Still" by Geto Boys
Released: 1996
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's the Office Space copier-bashing scene music.

Whenever I get frustrated with a misbehaving copier, I wonder if there's a baseball bat lying around nearby, and I start to mutter, "Back up in yo' ass with the resurrection..."

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: The Bar-Kays, "Too Hot to Stop"

Song: "Too Hot to Stop" by The Bar-Kays
Released: 1976
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It accompanies both the Foxy Brown-style opening credits of Superbad and Bernie Mac's slap-happy entrance scene in Head of State. In Superbad, "Too Hot to Stop" was an immediate sign that the Apatow production's soundtrack was going to be anything but irritatingly twee ("I want to tongue kiss whoever decided to keep the movie devoid of any twee music. Seriously, I do. Preferably with a Curtis Mayfield song blasting," wrote film blogger Kim Morgan in 2007). The 1976 tune is from the Mercury Records-era incarnation of The Bar-Kays, which opted for more of a P-Funk-influenced sound than the Stax-era incarnation that gave us 1967's "Soul Finger" (a classic I first heard while watching Spies Like Us as a kid).

Because of its line "I don't mind if I'm considered uncool," "Too Hot to Stop" was a fitting choice for a film that involves a kid like McLovin who doesn't care how uncool he looks when he tries to spit game. Too bad Superbad couldn't find some way to work in The Bar-Kays' equally fitting 1981 jam "Freaky Behavior" during the party scenes or the moments of awkward second base.

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Roxy Music, "Same Old Scene"

Song: "Same Old Scene" by Roxy Music
Released: 1980
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's mainly due to its appearance at the end of the first episode of the impressively soundtracked British cop show Ashes to Ashes, a sequel to the original version of Life on Mars that ran on BBC One from 2008 to 2010 and like the original, left a present-day British cop stranded in the past (this time, it was Keeley Hawes' Alex Drake, trapped in both 1981 and huge Dynasty shoulder pads).

From an Ashes to Ashes first-season soundtrack album customer review at the British version of Amazon.com, which notes that "Same Old Scene" isn't on the album:

But most mystifyingly, the one track which for me was as much the theme of the series as Bowie's 'Ashes To Ashes' itself - Roxy Music's 'Same Old Scene' - is also not included. This track was used in the ultra-cool sequence at the end of episode one which contained virtually no dialogue. The piece of music that the show's producers were originally going to use for this was 'Imagine' by John Lennon; considering how much the mood of the sequence would have been altered if they had gone ahead, it becomes clear how essential this Roxy Music song actually was in setting up the dark, brooding, sexually charged atmosphere so successfully evoked.

BBC America has yet to air Ashes to Ashes' third and final season, which I haven't seen yet, so unless I click to Wikipedia to read the spoilers, I have no way of knowing if Ashes to Ashes ended in a brilliant, David Bowie-scored way like the original Life on Mars did or in a batshit-crazy, completely random, "Poochie died on the way back to his home planet"-style way like the American Life on Mars did. Apparently, decades-old reruns of Star Trek: The Next Generation are a bigger priority to BBC America (last time I checked, that show's not British).



All the other "Rock Box" Tracks of the Day from this week:
The Dubliners, "The Rocky Road to Dublin"
Pixies, "Where Is My Mind?"
The Skyflakes, "Talk About Today"
The Jackson 5, "Never Can Say Goodbye"

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: The Jackson 5, "Never Can Say Goodbye"

Song: "Never Can Say Goodbye" by The Jackson 5
Released: 1971
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It was featured in 1994's Crooklyn, one of my favorite Spike Lee Joints. In an A.V. Club "Random Roles" piece that was posted last week, Crooklyn star Delroy Lindo said his film, which flopped at the box office, found its fans on video:

One of the things that's been interesting about the legacy of the film is that I can't tell you how often I'm walking down the street and somebody will come up to me and say something like, "My daughter loves that film," "My daughter knows every scene in that film," "My daughter went through a period where she would come home from school and put in the VHS of Crooklyn." I mean, I hear that a lot, or people saying, "Oh my God, that was my family." And not just African-Americans. I've had white people say "You know what, I'm from Brooklyn, that was my film; that's so evocative for me of my family, of my past."

Which moment in Crooklyn does "Never Can Say Goodbye" appear?: The sequence where Troy (Zelda Harris) heads back to Brooklyn and says goodbye to both her Virginia-based cousin and compressed anamorphic widescreen (to the relief of viewers who were annoyed by the way Spike intentionally distorted the film's images to convey Troy's discomfort in Virginia).

Crooklyn is where I first heard "Never Can Say Goodbye," which was written by actor/minister Clifton Davis of That's My Mama and Amen fame. Thank you, Spike, for introducing me to so many fantastic pieces of music like the original version of "Never Can Say Goodbye" and "Chaiyya Chaiyya."

You know those Kidz Bop cover versions of pop hits? I'm looking forward to hearing the Kidz Bop crew take a stab at Cee Lo Green's "Fuck You."

Kidz Bop covers of songs like "Since U Been Gone" make no sense because they have kids sing about relationship baggage they haven't experienced yet. You don't have to be Lorne from Angel to be able to detect that in their soulless delivery. I can't take seriously a tune about relationship woes if it's sung by someone who still eats paste.

"Never Can Say Goodbye" should have been just as nonsensical because little Michael Jackson was also singing about adult heartache, but his voice in that tune is the opposite of soulless (it's also devoid of the showboating that a whole future generation of American Idol contestants is so fond of). I have no idea which moment from his effed-up childhood Jackson was recalling in order to embody the angsty character in "Never Can Say Goodbye"--Alex, I'm gonna go with "What is heartache over a rat he lost?"--but whatever it was, it fueled one hell of a performance during "Never Can Say Goodbye." That's what separates young Michael Jackson from whatever Village of the Damned they pluck those Kidz Bop studio singers from.

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Tony Lucca, "Devil Town"

Song: "Devil Town" by Tony Lucca
Released: 2007
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: This frequently covered, Daniel Johnston-penned tune is featured in several Friday Night Lights episodes, including the first-season FNL eps "Eyes Wide Open" and "State" and this week's ep "Texas Whatever." It was also used in FNL's season 3 promos on DirecTV's 101 Network.

Because the Super Bowl is this Sunday, and then three days later, FNL--the best scripted drama series about football ever made, even though season 2's forced "Landry kills a guy" storyline was a huge fumble--is airing its final ep, today's "Rock Box" post is focused on "Devil Town."

The song, one of many great finds by FNL music supervisor Liza Richardson, has been as much of an essential part of the TV incarnation as Explosions in the Sky's instrumentals were in the 2004 FNL film. Johnston's lyrics are a perfect match with the bleakness of FNL ("All my friends were vampires/Didn't know they were vampires/Turns out I was a vampire myself/In the devil town"). The show already used up its "Devil Town" card in the penultimate ep this week (the tune was a fitting farewell to the East Dillon Lions), so I doubt the track will resurface in the series finale, but I'm sure Richardson has picked some equally striking tune for the occasion as we hear "Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!" chanted one last time.



All the other "Rock Box" Tracks of the Day from this week:
Cameo, "Candy"
Beastie Boys, "Shambala"
Vampire Weekend, "A-Punk"
The Blind Boys of Alabama, "Way Down in the Hole"

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Cameo, "Candy"

Song: "Candy" by Cameo
Released: 1986
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in The Best Man (and was stupidly omitted from the Best Man soundtrack album). It also turns up in the Death at a Funeral remake.
Which moment in The Best Man does it appear?: The Cameo jam is the bachelor party lapdancing music for Candy (Regina Hall), an Audre Lorde-reading stripper Murch (Harold Perrineau) falls for. It also plays while the characters do the Electric Slide at the wedding reception at the end of the movie. "If you ask me, it's impossible to not like a film that ends with the entire cast doing the electric slide to Cameo's '80s funk classic 'Candy,'" wrote online film critic Michael Dequina in 1999. True that.

When Hall appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien in 2005, her entrance music was "I Want Candy" by The Strangeloves. Someone in The Max Weinberg Seven must have been a Best Man fan (La Bamba?).

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Vampire Weekend, "A-Punk"

Song: "A-Punk" by the yacht-rocker-wardrobe-loving band Vampire Weekend
Released: 2008
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: I have no idea what exactly this song's about, but it opens my second favorite Adam McKay movie after Anchorman. In addition to Step Brothers, "A-Punk" has also been featured on the Britcom The Inbetweeners.

The foul-mouthed Step Brothers premieres tonight at 8 on FX with all of its f-words gone and one of its best gags--the sight of demure Mary Steenburgen unleashing an f-bomb--ruined.

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Harry Nilsson, "Jump Into the Fire"

Song: "Jump Into the Fire" by Harry Nilsson
Released: 1971
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in GoodFellas. Some IMDb research revealed that the track is also part of Bottle Shock, The Girl Next Door, A Good Year and a CSI: NY episode.
Which moment in GoodFellas does it appear?: It's one of six (!) existing songs in the unforgettable nine-minute "May 11, 1980" sequence that reportedly cost Martin Scorsese an arm and a leg... and a wing.

Last week, the music of Harry Nilsson--from his cover of Fred Neil's "Everybody's Talkin'" that was made famous by Midnight Cowboy to the charming original songs he penned for Robert Altman's Popeye--was the subject of an A.V. Club "Gateways to Geekery" piece. Below the article, several commenters cited "Jump Into the Fire" from Nilsson Schmilsson as the best part of GoodFellas.

The epic and apocalyptic-sounding "Jump Into the Fire" drum solo by Derek and the Dominos member and Gotham City police commissioner Jim Gordon is a great match with the cocaine-fueled descent of gangster Henry Hill (Ray Liotta). In the frenetic sequence (hey look, it's a young Kevin Corrigan as Henry's wheelchair-bound brother--and there's Isiah Whitlock Jr. not saying sheeeeeeeeeiiiiit!), GoodFellas music editor Christopher Brooks mashed up the kickass Nilsson track with The Stones' "Memo from Turner," a live version of The Who's "Magic Bus," The Stones' "Monkey Man," Muddy Waters' "Mannish Boy" and George Harrison's "What Is Life?" ("Ooh, that was an expensive scene," recalled Brooks in a fascinating GoodFellas oral history that GQ published last year). But the best piece of music during that sequence is silence. I'm referring to the ominous silence that surrounds Lois (Welker White), the smug and perpetually stoned babysitter/drug mule, as she pesters Henry about driving her home to pick up a lucky hat she can't fly on planes without, which leads him to his arrest. I love how Scorsese chose to leave that moment--the moment right before Henry gets pinched--unscored.

"He's one of the few people who knows how to match music and picture. It's not just about taking a great record and just slapping it up in there," said Scorsese fan Spike Lee in GQ's oral history. "That scene is directed, obviously, by someone who's used cocaine! Simple as that. And used it a lot. And if you've never tried cocaine, which I haven't, now I know what it feels like, after watching that scene."



All the other "Rock Box" Tracks of the Day from this week:
Aloe Blacc, "I Need a Dollar"
Spandau Ballet, "Gold"
Brother Noland, "Coconut Girl"
A Flock of Seagulls, "Space Age Love Song"

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Brother Noland, "Coconut Girl"

Song: "Coconut Girl" by Brother Noland
Released: 1982
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in Pineapple Express.
Which moment in Pineapple Express does it appear?: It accompanies the montage of pothead Dale (Seth Rogen) and his dealer Saul (current Best Actor Oscar nominee James Franco, in a performance I thought he should have been nominated for) hanging out with a trio of tough-talking kids they sold weed to. Dale and Saul's interaction with "Chachi" and his friends is reminiscent of the naturalistic scenes between the kids and Paul Schneider's railroad worker character in Pineapple Express director David Gordon Green's earlier film, the much more serious George Washington. Who knew Green would turn out to be such a good comedy director in Pineapple Express and Eastbound & Down? (Green's next film reunites him with Franco and Danny McBride--it's Your Highness, the medieval comedy that's become an Internet sensation because of, mmm, Natalie Portman in a thong).

Yesterday's "Rock Box" track was part of a Sym-Bionic Titan episode that was a source of minor controversy. Today's "Rock Box" track is also tied to some controversy--in England, that is. Pineapple Express was more controversial in England than it was here in America. Because they found the stoner kids sequence offensive, the BBFC (British Board of Film Classification), the English equivalent of the MPAA, gave the film an 18 certificate (their NC-17), which Columbia Pictures didn't want. The studio was shooting for a 15 for their release, so Columbia, Rogen and the Judd Apatow-led producers agreed to delete the stoner kids sequence to get a 15. Yeah, that BBFC uproar really stopped British kids from sneaking in to Pineapple Express like The Green Hornet said he used to do as a kid in order to glimpse racier fare when he noted that "I've been seeing R-rated movies since I was 12 years old and I'm okay!"

The maligned-in-the-U.K. sequence gives some nice exposure to a catchy tune I never heard before. "Coconut Girl," which was a radio hit in Brother Noland's home state of Hawaii, is an example of a sound called "Jawaiian," a genre that mixes Caribbean and Hawaiian elements. According to a 1992 Billboard article, the Jawaiian sound exploded in Hawaii in 1990 before peaking sales-wise in 1991.

From Honolulu magazine's 2010 "100 Years of Hawaiian Music" article:

Jawaiian became the scapegoat of choice for Hawaiian music buffs lamenting the decline of traditional culture. Not that it did anything to quell the reggae takeover. “If you talk to Hawaiian music purists, they revile Jawaiian,” says Amy Stillman. “If you talk to the rank and file, though, they love it. As soon as they’re out of halau, that’s what’s on the radio on the drive home. It’s expressing thoughts and sentiments that are relevant, in a musical language that is relevant.”

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: The Jimi Hendrix Experience, "Crosstown Traffic"

Song: "Crosstown Traffic" by The Jimi Hendrix Experience
Released: 1968
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in the broadcast version of Keen Eddie's "Keeping Up Appearances" episode. Paramount Home Entertainment didn't bother to clear "Crosstown Traffic" for the DVD version, which I refuse to watch.

Which moment in "Keeping Up Appearances" does it appear?: The sequence where Detective Eddie Arlette (Mark Valley) goes for a ride in a Bentley that once was owned by Jimi Hendrix.



Keen Eddie is a lost comedic gem from creator J.H. Wyman, who's currently a writer/producer for Fringe, which returns in a new and not-exactly-great time slot tonight and briefly had Valley as a regular before he starred in Human Target, where he's basically playing Eddie Arlette again, but with mad fighting skills. Wyman's London-based cop show was too foreign, anarchic and offbeat for mainstream America (it wasn't dour and moralistic enough for them--the original CSI, the #1 prime-time hit that year, was more up their conservative-leaning, bodybag-filled alley). But Keen Eddie won over TV critics (National Review, of all publications, actually liked it) and whoever were the three or four viewers who caught it on Fox. I was one of them, and I instantly dug "Crosstown Traffic," the tune where Hendrix MacGyvered a kazoo out of a comb and a piece of cellophane, when I first heard it on Keen Eddie.

All the other "Rock Box" Tracks of the Day from this week:
Matt & Kim, "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare"
Tom Jones, "Sex Bomb (Peppermint Disco Mix)"
The Motherhood, "Soul Town"
Edo G feat. Masta Ace, "Wishing"

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Matt & Kim, "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare"

Song: "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare" by the Brooklyn duo Matt & Kim
Released: 2009
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in Community's pilot episode. I wonder if the choice of "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare" is a swipe at the pants Joel McHale is wearing all through the pilot (see above). If so, that's awesome.
Which moment in the Community pilot does it appear?: The scene when Jeff (McHale) tries to ditch the study group--a rambunctious bunch of folks he'll grow to tolerate over the course of the season--and is caught by Britta (Gillian Jacobs) while she's having a smoke break. The song also turns up when Jeff takes the Spanish test answers out of the envelope Professor Duncan (John Oliver) gave him and discovers his friend tricked him and slipped him nothing but blank paper.

My favorite non-cable show Community is back tonight with its first new episode since the ambitious stop-motion-animated Christmas ep, so here's "Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare," which was also featured in the trailers and promos for the pilot before it premiered.

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: Stevie Wonder, "I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever)"

Song: "I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever)" by Stevie Wonder
Released: 1972
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in High Fidelity, which was where I first heard this overlooked Wonder tune.
Which moment in High Fidelity does it appear?: The closing credits, which are a special treat for fontophiles like myself. Mmm, Stencil...

Mmm, Eurostile...

The characters' hatred of Wonder's '80s and '90s output was the subject of one of Jack Black's key scenes ("Rob, 'Top Five Musical Crimes Perpetrated by Stevie Wonder in the '80s and '90s.' Go."), so it's no surprise that Rob (John Cusack) opted for 1972's "I Believe" while making a mixtape for Laura (Iben Hjejle). "I Believe" is the closing track on Wonder's Talking Book album. In 2005's 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die, Stevie Chick wrote that "'I Believe' finds Stevie's heart broken, but his belief in love still intact"--much like Rob at the end of the film.

Hear Stevie pick himself up, dust himself off and start all over again while the High Fidelity closing credits display many different kinds of awesome band flyer-inspired typography at The Art of the Title Sequence.

"Rock Box" Track of the Day: The Who, "I'm One"

Song: "I'm One" by The Who (because today is 1/11/11)
Released: 1973
Why's it part of the "Rock Box" playlist?: It's featured in the 2000 Freaks and Geeks episode "Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers."
Which moment in "Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers" does it appear?: The wordless sequence where latchkey kid Bill Haverchuck (Martin Starr) comes home from school looking rather miserable after a not-so-great day, makes himself a grilled cheese (with chocolate cake on the side), flips on Dinah Shore's talk show Dinah! and laughs his ass off to a set by Dinah's guest comic Garry Shandling.

During the outstanding two-part WTF episode where he interviewed Freaks and Geeks writer/producer Judd Apatow, host Marc Maron said the "I'm One" sequence was the Freaks and Geeks moment that resonated with him the most because it relates to how "comedy was really one of the few things that made [Apatow and I] happy, that made us feel good, that took away the pain, that gave us the sense that things were going to be okay."

Apatow, who co-wrote "Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers," lifted the "I'm One" sequence from his own life as a child of divorced parents who found refuge in comedy and watched hours of stand-ups on talk shows after school. "I was at my fantasy world watching Michael Keaton do stand-up on The Mike Douglas Show, and I couldn't have been happier," Apatow told Maron. "I look back on it as a great time. I don't think, 'Oh, that was so sad. I was alone in my room.' I was like Bill, laughing my ass off, watching Jay Leno in 1979 on The Mike Douglas Show."

During the filming of the sequence, Apatow and "Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers" co-writer Bob Nickman got Starr to laugh so hard by telling him the dirtiest jokes off-camera. Both funny and poignant (it's Apatow's ultimate salute to his mentor and Larry Sanders Show boss Shandling, whom Apatow first met as a teen when he interviewed him for the high school radio show that Maron played excerpts from on WTF), the sequence is one of many reasons why viewers like myself love Freaks and Geeks, and it's enhanced by The Who's 1973 track from Quadrophenia.

Because the freaks half of the episode revolved around a Who concert, every existing song during "Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers" is a Who track, except for "Summer Breeze" by Seals and Crofts (this was a few years before the CSI franchise introduced the band's songs to a new generation of viewers). No other track on the show perfectly encapsulates Bill, the geek who's most comfortable in his own skin and with his lot in life ("I'm a loser--no chance to win") and doesn't care what others think of him ("And I can see/That this is me"). His sense of humor helps take away the pain.